M y name is texasjackier and I am so glad that I have found this site. I am so hopefull, that this is gioing to be good for me, and already I no I will good for alot of people in my place. I am 49 and I have been on disilibilty ever since 1993. Not full disibility, but after reading some of yalls stories, I guess mi problems are little but they are sure long lived. I spend about 6 or more houre a day on this computer just looking for the right help. I know just about every resource program there is, and I dont have a printer so I write everthing down. So far I can trow some sugestions to a few of the stories I have read. You see all I have ever wanter to do was help people. Now here's some of my dilemas. I am BIPOLA MANIC DEPRESENT, I also suffer from PTS. I Live with my mother she is 73 and she does not beleave in MENTAL HEALTH PROBLEMS> I never have lived on my own, well I have but always in one of her houses.I have never bought my own car, always ones she has got me{without me asking} that means I dont know how to rent a house , buy a house, buy a car,to put it mildly {MAKE A SINGLE DICESSION ON MY OWN} I Hate this. I Have a Kidney disiase also. I cant get section 8 Because of my aliving arrangements. I cant even get food stamps because they consider me {SHELTER PLUS} so after so many times of trying to get full SS Bennifits, Houseing,even food, has really got me beat down mentaly, so now I just sit and read. I try to go out and look for a job but 13 years is a long time sto sit. I enrolled In a program called {aTICKET TO WORK} threw SSA, But the time I called all the places in there MAXAMUS NETWORK there where none . I would like to go to a trade school but I only get as far as looking for them on the web. I am so scared to go to one and apply.Thats what happens when you stop taking meds,.I guess I am waiting for Mom or someone to do it for me. And I hate myself for that. I cant get my own place because im lost and I failed the first time I tried.I am not retarded just Mental and I dont KNOW where to start. I know there so many programs out there but for some reason all I can do i PREY, Hope, and dream. I know there is noone out there thats going to do it for me. I cant even go to my med. Doctor any more because I {HAVE PANIC ATTACTS WHEN I PULL IN THE PARKING LOT} so now im sold turky on meds too. I hate being a waist of space.I no I have a lot to give to others in my plase but I am scared. Need Help if any one got any ideals. Thanks Also if akot of yall readers would go to the library and get the book wrote by MATHEW LESCO I promise he has every housing , food, trade schools ,fundings, and even who to write or call about building ripoffs, If any one wqant to know about any of them ask me I bought it becauese Its too musch to absorb in 2 weeks. thanks to any one who reads this bye for now. Jackie
